I’m not saying that your efforts to fulfill cultural standards are bad. Quite the opposite. You’re doing a Herculean job of living up to standards you truly believe are right and good. I admire that very much. It takes incredible self-discipline to go against your nature. If I scolded you about this effort, I’d just be administering another dose of punitive socialization. I’m not condemning you in the slightest. But I do want you to notice one thing: whenever you go against your true nature to serve your culture, you freaking hate it.

~ Martha Beck, The Way of Integrity